Crude Jokes




    Over 1900 crude jokes. They are just that CRUDE, they contain swearing are are likely to offend

    *Think you’re funnier; then submit your own jokes for inclusion in the app and get the credit too.

    *Warning, these jokes contain swearing and topics of an adult nature and as such are intended only for grown ups. Please do not download if you easily offend you will only get upset*

    *New jokes added weekly
    *Submit your own joke for inclusion in the app.
    *Move to SD card (android 2.2+ only.)
    *This app will remember were you are up to even if you turn off your phone or update the app
    *Share with SMS/Email
    *Copy to Clipboard(via menu button), for posting to social networking sites.
    *Random joke button
    *Hold the left arrow to go back to the start
    *Hold the right arrow to go to the end
    *Link to developer’s other apps in the market
    *Change the size of the text
    *Change the color of the text
    *Change the style of the text
    *Change the background
    *Rate the app

    Examples of what's inside (jokes are not censored in the app):

    "What do you call a female police officer that shaves her pubic hair?
    C**t Stubble."

    "The Sunday School teacher was speaking to her class one Sunday morning and she asked the question, "When you die and go to Heaven ... which
    part of your body goes first?"
    Suzie raised her hand and said, "I think it's your hands."
    "Why do you think it's your hands, Suzie?"
    Suzie replied, "Because when you pray, you hold your hands together in front of you and God just takes your hands first!"
    "What a wonderful answer!," the teacher said.
    Now, Tommy raised his hand and said, "Teacher, I think it's your legs."
    The teacher looked at him with the strangestlook on her face.
    "Now, Tommy, why do you think it would be your legs?"
    Tommy said, "Well, I walked into Mommy and Daddy's bedroom the other night,
    Mommy had her legs straight up in the air and she was moaning, 'O God, I'm
    coming!' And if Dad hadn't had her pinned down, we'd a lost her for sure!!!""

    "One day a guy with premature ejaculation problems went to a doctor.
    The doctor said, "Whenever you feel the urge to ejaculate, startle
    So he went out and bought a starter pistol.
    When he got home, his wife was naked in bed, ready for him. So they
    got in the 69 position and started at it. Soon he felt the urge to
    cum, so he fired the pistol.
    The next day he went to the doctor. The doctor asked him how it went.
    He said, "Not too good. My wife bit off three inches of my dick, s**t
    in my face, and my neighbor came out of the closet naked with his
    hands up.""

    N.B. Permissions are required by the Ad networks, which keep the app free.

    Appsolutely Fabulous, takes no responsibility, for the content of this app. None of the jokes were written by anyone at Appsolutely Fabulous, they were all either sourced form the internet or sent in by the users of this app. We accept no blame for any offense caused, care has been taken to remove offensive jokes, however it you are offended by any of the jokes please report them to us via the app and we will consider the joke for removal.

    Tags: vulgar jokes , crude women jokes , rude blond jokes , crude male bashing jokes , crude jokes photos , crude jokes , crude humor pics , crude humor , 900 crude jokes

    Users review

    from 477 reviews



    Users comments for Crude Jokes

    K Yan

    by K Yan

    Sep 21, 2014  |  "OK"

    Most are stupid.

    Chris Fulgham

    by Chris Fulgham

    Sep 02, 2014  |  "Awesome"


    Perow Gourlay

    by Perow Gourlay

    Aug 23, 2014  |  "Poor"

    This app should be called Sick Crude Jokes (im not being complimentary.) I apologize for giving 1 star, yes I realise I'm being way to generous. I've uninstalled this non funny app

    David Bunn

    by David Bunn

    Jul 23, 2014  |  "Poor"

    dumb jokes just plain dumb

    Long CH

    by Long CH

    Jul 21, 2014  |  "Good"

    Maybe you should change the app picture and I will change it to 5 stars

    Marta Rogić

    by Marta Rogić

    Jul 08, 2014  |  "Poor"

    This game sucks, i hate it!